How come it feels like it's meant to be // Every time I fall in love?
Alexa Chung on Heartbreak
Thursday, 9 April 2015
"The problem with heartbreak is that nobody can help you when you're heartbroken. Nobody and nothing. Not the films you watch alone desperately searching for a character who feels the way you do, not the glasses or bottles of whiskey you keep by your bed and certainly not Instagram. Instagram will not mend your broken heart, despite your best efforts to post pictures of yourself looking 'happy.' Every time you post a picture of yourself to Instagram looking fake happy a fairy dies. Fact. Also, scrolling through photos of girls your ex may or may not be shagging won't help you. You need to remind yourself that the right filter can be fantastically flattering and she probably doesn't look that good in real life.
"Sometimes when I need answers I like to take my questions to Google. I googled 'how long does heartbreak last?' The result more popular than that was 'how long does heartburn last?' This implies people suffer from heartburn more than they do heartbreak which is a good thing because heartbreak sucks way fucking more than acid reflux ever could. Weirdly though a broken heart does physically hurt. It feels heavy, like someone is sitting on your chest. Sometimes you wake up with pins and needles in your right arm. I met a girl who told me that an acupuncturist told her that if this happens you have a broken heart. The irony of a pin and needle therapist being an expert on needles and pins is fantastic. And that's the other thing it'll do to you. Heartbreak will force you to strike up conversation with anyone who will listen and who might be able to tell you it's going to be OK.
"There are upsides to despair. You can wear a blanket instead of a coat and your friends won't judge you. You can smoke indoors because no-one will have the heart to tell an inconsolable girl that a smoking ban has been in place for eight years. And you find out that people are very nice and that they care about you even if the person you care about most doesn't. When somebody makes you laugh when you're sad, that's the most enjoyable laugh you'll ever experience. On a positive day during an outdoor and legal cigarette break I told a friend that I was fine and trotted out the line 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.' To which she replied, deadpan, 'that's not true, that which doesn't kill you makes you wanna die.'
"The nicest thing I heard during the worst time in my life was this: 'you have to suffer heartbreak so you know what to tell your daughter when she has her heart broken.' I'm Alexa Chung and one day I'm going to have a daughter and I'm going to know what to say to her. I'm going to say:
"'Nobody goes through life without having their heart broken and one day you'll wake up and it'll be OK.'
"I can't fucking wait for that day to come."
Floyd & Violet
Friday, 27 February 2015
On occasion, I will come across a story that allows me the hope that true love - the everlasting, fairytale kind we grow up believing is out there for us - is within reach. Floyd and Violet are one such story. Played out like a scene from Nicholas Sparks' The Notebook, childhood sweethearts Floyd and Violet Hartwig married in 1947, while Floyd was on leave from the Navy. Becoming inseparable, the pair kept in touch via letters while Floyd was at war, and later settled in California. This month, the couple passed away. They went within five hours of one another. And they were holding hands. Before the passing, and given only two weeks to live, Floyd had told a doctor "I’m OK but I want her fixed" - a fact that warms my heart more than I could possibly express. I'm sharing this as a thank you, Floyd and Violet, for showing me what it can mean to love another, and for showing the world how beautiful and worthwhile a relationship can be once you've found the right person. You truly are an inspiration.(Full story here. Image via the Hartwig family.)
More in the press: True love in 36 questions.
And something else adorable: Eddie Redmayne's BAFTA speech, which I may never recover from.
♥
The Theory Of Everything
Monday, 19 January 2015
There should be no boundaries to human endeavor.
We are all different.
However bad life may seem, there is always something you can do, and succeed at.
While there's life, there is hope.
I finally watched The Theory of Everything last night, and I can't get it out of my head. Based on the book 'Traveling to Infinity: My Life with Stephen' - a memoir by Jane Hawking - the film follows the relationship between Stephen Hawking and his first wife, Jane, from its very beginning until its very end. A truly beautiful piece of cinema, the development and transformation of the characters is nothing short of mesmerising, and the subject matter nothing short of devastating. But that's not what got to me. In fact, the thing that really struck me about this story - aside from the (very upsetting) portrayal of the tragic condition that threatened to end Stephen's life - was the quiet determination of Jane. Jane Hawking, a person that, unlike her former husband, could go by unnoticed. But a person that deserves to be recognised for her achievements nonetheless. For her stubborn, steadfast support of the person she'd chosen to spend her life with, even when things were at their most difficult. For her courage and her selflessness in giving herself so completely to another, and in her resolve to stand by the man she so blindly fell for, and who she gave up a huge part of her life to be with, even when everyone was telling her to walk away. If the Oscar worthy performance of the brilliant Eddie Redmayne, and of the ever fascinating Felicity Jones (who I have been a little bit obsessed with since Like Crazy) wasn't enough to draw you in, the true story of one woman's - dare I say extremely British, stiff upper lip what what! style - love and compassion for her increasingly difficult husband should. It's the most heart-wrenching thing I've seen in a long time, and you have to watch it. Just be prepared to ball your eyes out... I was basically inconsolable by the time the credits rolled. ♥
More of the women behind great men: Hadley Richardson. Edie Sedgwick. Jean Shrimpton.
